Is Spongebob Squarepants Gay/ Does anyone else give a shit?
Article 1: http://www.sierratimes.com/05/02/02/mcelroy02022005.htm
Article 2: http://www.detnews.com/2005/lifestyle/0501/29/D01-70316.htm
Article 3 (Conservative, because I'm Fair and Balanced): http://www.theconservativevoice.com/modules/news/article.php?storyid=2389
So, it's been quite a time since I got really pissed off at something, but I think its about time to address one of the biggest questions of our time:
Is this gentleman a homosexual?
Well, first of all, I'd like to quote my Conservative Voice article on this 'issue' of 'morals':
In truth, this tale has very
little to do with SpongeBob himself, and everything to do with the media’s
ability to obscure the facts and to direct lies and scorn toward those of us who
care about defending children.
-Senior Editor - 1/30/2005
Apparently, conservatives are very upset about the appearance of another hero for children that might have a questionable sexuality. In this case, the target is a man who is a sponge, and wears a tie and khaki shorts every day. He lives in a pineapple, and his best friend is a starfish that lives under a rock. Sort of like the conservatives: except, instead of living under a rock, they have their heads up their collective asses.
I concluded by sharing a word of
concern about a video that will be distributed to 61,000 public and private
elementary schools across the nation, for use on the proposed "We Are Family
Day," March 11.
The video, which millions of children will soon see, features nearly 100
favorite cartoon characters that kids will instantly recognize, including not
only SpongeBob, but also Barney the Dinosaur, the Muppets, Dora the Explorer,
Bob the Builder, Winnie the Pooh, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Jimmy Neutron and
Big Bird. The video itself is innocent enough and does not mention anything
overtly sexual. Rather, it features the children’s cartoon characters singing
and dancing along to the popular disco hit "We Are Family."
But while the video is harmless on its own, I believe the agenda behind it is
sinister.
Oh REALLY? A sinister plot? Sounds
like a job for a fucktard. God only know, if everyone is family, it means they
WON'T have sex with each other.
And what's with this?
The video itself is innocent enough and does not mention anything overtly sexual.
WTF
The video itself is innocent enough and does not mention anything overtly sexual.
You JUST SAID... Never mind!
My brief comments at the FRC gathering were intended to express concern not about SpongeBob or Big Bird or any of their other cartoon friends, but about the way in which those childhood symbols are apparently being hijacked to promote an agenda that involves teaching homosexual propaganda to children.
Ah, I should have known. Once again, a liberal agenda has begun to overthrow the consciousness of the public, and their moral integrity is being compromised by a bunch of cartoons that are singing. God forbid they should be compromised by, say, something like... Abu Gharib and the prison scandal surrounding the soldiers who are supposed to be our role models of heroism?
Hey, as long as we are killing those gosh darned Muslims, we can worry about sponges like Spongebob!
Allow me to let everyone in on a little secret:
I realize that your priests, pastors and religious figures are telling you that guys banging each other in the ass is wrong, but really, people... when compared to killing innocents, how can two guys getting each other off bother you? And in the words of Ron White, we're all gay, because who wants to watch a porno where the guy has a small penis? Nobody, that's who.
Conservatives are, historically, the people that wanted slavery to continue, alcohol to be banned, and now, gays to be exiled. Now, since we have had progressive change, we've been able to get some stuff done and allow black people to become citizens and allow your white ass to drink alcohol on the weekends even if you aren't allowed to (and we both know you aren't).
Without progressive thought, what do you have? Oh yeah, IMMORAL CONDUCT. You morons have to realize that conservatism has never gotten us anywhere. Why keep things the same when they don't work?
See this? THIS is where POOR people live. The conservatives want the poor people to stay there, because its disposable manpower, and they will suck dick for cheap.
So, think about your rich father's penis being blown on by a Puerto Rican prostitute and support Spongebob, or one day, you might be in the same position as the prostitute. In fact, I hope you are: maybe you will vote for progress next time instead of slums. Moron.
Go home